Top Ten Things You’re Doing to Ruin Your Sex Life
Ever wonder why your sex life is not doing well? It could be because of the pandemic. It could be the fact that you’re not getting out much. There could be a lot of reasons for a failing intimate life.
In my expert opinion as a certified sex therapist, I can tell you a bunch of reasons that your sexual intimacy is falling apart. Here are the top ten:
In my expert opinion as a certified sex therapist, I can tell you a bunch of reasons that your sexual intimacy is falling apart.
One: You’re watching too much porn. I have nothing against porn. In fact, I think it can do a lot of good in some cases. But if you’re wondering why you don’t have a lot of energy for your partner at the end of the day, take a look at your porn use. If you’re masturbating to porn you are siphoning off your sexual energy from the relationship and most likely not leaving a lot at the end of the day for your partner.
Two. Waiting till late at night to have sex. If you’re imagining that the end of the day is the time to do it, you’re probably wrong. Waiting till the last moments of the day means you are out of juice, you’re tired, and your partner is too. Don’t wait till you hit the finish line to try and get intimate. Plan on something earlier, maybe before dinner, or wait till the morning on a weekend. Give yourselves the time and attention your sex life deserves.
Three. Always let your partner initiate. Don’t assume that your partner is always up for the task. It's easy to get into a rut when you let one person take the reins and be in charge of initiating sex. Shake things up and take turns. Otherwise, you run the risk of waiting for the initiator to start things and if they’re tired or distracted then no one has any fun.
Four. Believing that the end goal is the male orgasm. Instead of focusing on the end zone, which we learn (from porn) is the male ejaculation, try instead to think instead about how much pleasure you can squeeze into a lovemaking session. Whether you are male on male or female on female or a group of more on more, pleasure should be your goal, not orgasm. Orgasm is a wonderful by-product of sex but shouldn't be the ultimate destination. Take the pressure off of both of you (or all of you) and just enjoy yourselves.
